What is Love?: Lexi DeHalo

Gay Men Kissing in a Crowd

What is love? Many philosophers and poets have struggled to answer this question for centuries. I find this question most fascinating because we as humans spend so much time enamored with the idea of love. It’s all around us, in movies and books, and we are constantly striving to find that person who completes us. But why do we do this?

I began to question this after my first philosophy class in college. My professor made us read some very interesting literature that struggled to answer this same question. Some ideas were amusing and others were more heartfelt, but they all had valid points in their own way. One philosopher in particular struck a chord with me. He believed that people were actually merged together as one person in the beginning and then split apart over time. He said that our need to be with another person, body and soul, was actually the desire to complete the other half of ourselves. That is why people who are in love say they feel “complete.” Others have the belief that we are created as twin flames or two halves of the same soul and we can spend many lifetimes searching for our other half before we find them. It is one explanation for why some people never find their special someone during their lifetime and also why some of us experience much heartbreak before we find our other half.

“The idea that we are destined to be with another person and that there is someone out there who is supposed to understand and love us for all our flaws and imperfections is something I think we all want.”

I personally believe in this true form of love. That is why I write about it so passionately. But there is so much more to love than just a passing feeling that only exists in one moment of time. Love isn’t always easy. In fact, most times it’s hard and is constantly being challenged by the world around us. You have to fight for love, even if that means facing adversity. The ManLove genre touches often on these subjects, showing how hard love can be at times and how the characters struggle to fight for their love. That is one of the things I enjoy most about this genre and ultimately why I decided to write ManLove. I wanted to show the world that love has no boundaries. Love is love, no matter what form it comes in.

My friends tell me I am very much a romantic at heart, and I have to say I quite agree with them. It’s not that I don’t understand the often harsh realities of the world we live in. To be honest, I understand them all too well and know that love can suck sometimes. I will never forget the pain of losing my first love. But even though, at times, we may find that we are hurtling face-first to the ground instead of into the arms of our significant other as we fall hopelessly in love, we still manage to pick ourselves up off the floor and try again. This is because deep down inside we hope that there really is someone out there waiting for us. The idea that we are destined to be with another person and that there is someone out there who is supposed to understand and love us for all our flaws and imperfections is something I think we all want. I believe it is this drive that makes us seek out love in all forms, whether it’s reading about it in a book or watching it in a movie. We want to understand love, to feel love, to be loved. It lets us know that we are not alone in this world and that one day we might just find the other half to our souls. It shows us that while our time on this planet may seem short in comparison to the billions of years that our universe has existed, we can make a bond so strong that it can go beyond our mortal life and withstand the test of time.

“When you truly love someone, you give them a part of yourself that can never be taken back.”

The feeling of love is a great feeling that can make us happy even in times of great sorrow, but true love is more than just an emotion. It is a state of being. To be truly in love with someone means more than just caring for that person. When you truly love someone, you give them a part of yourself that can never be taken back. From the moment that person enters your life, you are forever changed, and it is my firm belief that no matter what form love comes in, if you are given the chance to be with that special someone, don’t pass it up. More often than not, it won’t come around twice. So keep your eyes and heart open and know that love can always find a way so long as you and your significant other are willing to fight for it. Love is not selfish. It is not prideful. It is humble and kind and enables us to overcome hardships we couldn’t face alone. The capacity for love is inside us all. We just have to open our minds up to the possibility that love has no limits. Whether you’re gay, straight, bi, or transgendered, I believe there is someone out there for all of us, and only when we find that someone who can open their hearts to us and love us as completely as we love them, do we find that true love that legends are made of. That being said, I shall end this article with a quote from one of my favorite philosophers. Enjoy.

Every heart sings a song, incomplete, until another heart whispers back.

Those who wish to sing always find a song.

At the touch of a lover, everyone becomes a poet.

—Plato

 By Lexi DeHalo

 

photo credit: philippe leroyer via photopin cc